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Archives => Public Archives => House of Random => Topic started by: Owen on February 02, 2012, 12:41:37 AM

Title: K
Post by: Owen on February 02, 2012, 12:41:37 AM
We were dressed and ready to go out for the New Years Eve Party. We turned on a night light, turned the answering machine on, covered our pet parakeet and put the cat in the backyard. We phoned the local cab company and requested a taxi. The taxi arrived and we opened the front door to leave the house. The cat we put out in the back yard, scoots back into the front door.

We didn't want the cat shut in the house because she always tries to eat the bird.. My wife goes out to the taxi, while I went inside to get the cat. The cat runs upstairs, with me in hot pursuit. Waiting in the cab, my wife doesn't want the driver to know that the house will be empty for the night. So, she explains to the taxi driver that I will be out soon, 'He's just going upstairs to say Goodbye to my mother.'

A few minutes later, I get into the cab. 'Sorry I took so long,' I said, as we drove away. 'That stupid bitch was hiding under the bed. I had to poke her with a coat hanger to get her to come out! She tried to take off, so I grabbed her by the neck. Then, I had to wrap her in a blanket to keep her from scratching me. But it worked! I hauled her fat ass downstairs and threw her out into the back yard!

The cab driver hit a parked car.
Title: Re: K
Post by: Randy on February 02, 2012, 12:51:56 AM
tl;dr
Title: Re: K
Post by: Vio on February 02, 2012, 01:14:08 AM
LOL
Title: Re: K
Post by: Keith on February 02, 2012, 02:08:51 AM
When did you get married  ;)
Title: Re: K
Post by: Kevin on February 02, 2012, 03:31:11 AM
csb
Title: Re: K
Post by: PineappleTom on February 02, 2012, 07:12:18 AM
eh, average. Didn't even smile.
Title: Re: K
Post by: Wayshow on February 02, 2012, 12:44:39 PM
I'm confused :@
Title: Re: K
Post by: Kung_Man149 on February 02, 2012, 03:05:23 PM
Sounds like a typical night for me..
Title: Re: K
Post by: Taibz on February 03, 2012, 01:39:06 PM
This is one of those things that only mostly only happens in movies

I Lol'd  :>
Title: Re: K
Post by: Dorcha3377 on February 06, 2012, 11:33:30 PM
Bad movies/